Wednesday, July 23, 2008
The event happened last night.. when my mum and my sister was on their way homeMe: Daddy, you've got colleagues that use vulgarities?Dad: Ya of course! I pointed my finger and say 'You better stop cursing me with that word, try facing the mirror and say it 3 times back to yourself, see how you feel' they just F at me all the way know! I angry I shout back!Me: orh.. Dad: why? your friends in school like that ah?Me: er.. ya la.. I just dunno how to..Dad: This kind of thing must be heads on.. don't care what happen next, you always like that la! Nowonder that time your choir teacher bully you, after I call the vice principle what happen?Me: that women of course black face la! she hated me from then wat..Dad: Thats why you scared your friends hate you also right? Nowonder you always kena bully..Me: no la, I still have friends that are good.. I trust them..Dad: Nevermind, I tell you, the bible says we must bless those who curse.. wait wait I find the verse.Me: Huh? you mean when they say 'F you la' then say back 'God bless you' to them?Dad: yes.. you continue to be humble, they want to curse tell them go ahead! The bible also did say, 'Vengeance is mine, I will repay' So you don't have to worry one..Me: No la.. not all my friends like that la, some just use for fun lor.. or some trying to be funny only la..Dad: There this verse Romans 12:9-21.. read..After reading that, me and my dad continued that conversation and I broke down.. He hates it when im sad or depressed. He encouraged me so much that I know I had to save my friends.. I didn't want my friends to get hurt, but after what I read.. I know I had to do something.Saying 'it' once or 2ce would be fine.. but more than that is crossing my limit. I was shaking and scared.. I know I had to do it because I really had enough.. 'Enough is enough' I told myself.. I was so scared, then just somehow within a split second a voice told me, 'Do not fear, for I am with you, Be strong and you'll find victory.. this is my sanctuary, you know what words are forbidden within these grounds..' I soon felt warmth, I didn't wanna hurt anyone, but i know I had to say it.. I could really feel Him just right next to me, Im not kidding.. Its been the first time in many months since I felt His warmth..Soon those words really came out, I said it in a harsh tone.. All I could think of was 'Im sorry Lord, I had to.. I just couldn't take it.. I didn't mean to hurt ayone.. but I knew I had to..' He left, I continued to shiver.. It was so cold.. when chapel was over, It was all in perfect timing.. Joyce said 'You did the right thing.. Don't worry so much!'First time in months feeling Him just right next to me was the feeling that I thought I had lost for last few months.. I could really feel Him watching and guiding me what to say.. at the same time I feared His presence.. My dad said this important sentence to me, 'Your friends are important.. true, but you know, if they ever cared bout you, they'll care bout how you feel when certain words come off their mouths.. you decide on your own. But if you know some are saying for fun, then its ok, as long as you know you can't take it anymore just say what you feel.'I wrote on my blog, 'love your neighbours and enemies as you love yourself', When my dad flipped another page of the bible last night, the verse appeared again.. I know He's telling me what to do, all these weren't just a coincidence..JoJo-Exceptional
You're beautiful but you don't know
Can't see what's there inside your soul
Always feelin like you're not good enough
You wish you could be someone else
Sometimes you just can't see yourself
But I can see just who you are, who you are
You're exceptional the way you are
Don't need to change for nobody
You're incredible, anyone can see that
When will you believe that?
You are nothing but exceptional
You never you think you measure up
Never smart or cool, or pretty enough
Always feeling different from all the rest
You feel so out of place, you think you don't fit in
I think you're perfect in the skin you're in
You're just perfect just how you are, just how you are
If you could see the one I see when I see you
You'd know how lucky you are to be you
I see through into you
The lyrics are beautiful and written by JoJo herself.. I hope I can really help this friend of mine.. But at the same time I know that no one can help her now.. only God Himself.. Just like what my friends said.. 'You know you've tried your best.. so you don't have to feel bad..' And my dad, 'Don't give up on these friends.. in this kind of situation.. they need you now more than ever, continue to do good and pray for them, you'll be blessed and so will they.'
Im so sorry if this post is really super holy.. but I had to say what I feel.. its like my only way of communication.. Like I said.. I know I can never say anything when I speak to her personally.. I'll end up getting hurt and she'll end up getting worse, just trying to prove me wrong..
For God is with me((: And I know I can always count on Him((:/3:20 PM
